Being a Tuesday, today is the day I call in to a supermarket in an effort to pick up a small and sometimes difficult list of items and objects as requested by my mum.
First task is to find a parking bay actually wide enough to take a motor car. From past experience I have discovered, the further away from the store the larger the bay.
These bays are usually less well lit and carry the added risk of finding on return one of your windows smashed by some PRI*K looking for loose change or your tax disc.
Once inside the store, as if by magic I somehow became invisible. Everybody who pushed pulled or swung a trolley managed to hit me with it.
Everybody seemed to want to stand in front of my target item and just stare at it, preventing me from getting anywhere near. If not a punter, it would be a member of staff moving all of the fresh produce to the rear of the shelf in an effort to make you purchase manky out of date stuff.
Have yoy tried to buy your favourite brand of pickles or sauce?. Whole isles of own brand stuff. What are they on? If my mum says Bartons Pickles THAT is what she wants.
Then ,there is the queue at the till. How many vouchers can a woman fit in a purse? Then to top it all pay the remainder in pennies.
Why do I always pick the wrong queue?
Today I opted for a middle distance bay, one with empty spaces either side. By the time I emerged from the store both spaces had been taken by knackerd old bangers, leaving me about six inches per side to squeeze me and my haul inside the car.
All that for a pint of milk an a loaf.